*These are sentences actually typed by Medical secretaries in N Hospitals
Greater Glasgow, Scotland:*
*
1. The patient has no previous history of suicides.*
*
2. Patient has left her white blood cells at another hospital.*
*
3. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a
40 pound weight gain in the past three days.*
*
4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very
hot in bed last night.*
*
5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.*
*
6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it
disappeared.*
*
7.. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be
depressed.*
*
8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.*
*
9. Discharge status:- Alive, but without my permission.*
*
10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert, but
forgetful.*
*
11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.*
*
12. She is numb from her toes down.*
*
13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.*
*
14. The skin was moist and dry.*
*
15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.*
*
16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.*
*
17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.*
*
18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she
got a divorce.*
*
19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our care for physical
therapy.*
*
20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.*
*
21 Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.*
*
22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.*
*
23. Skin: somewhat pale, but present.*
*
24. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.*
*
25. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.*
*
26. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities*
*
.
27. When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.*
*
28. The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran
out of fuel and crashed.*
*
29. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.*
*
30. She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate
directions in early December.*
*
31. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Smith, who felt we should sit on
the abdomen and I agree.*
*
32. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a
stock broker instead.*
*
33. By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was
feeling bette
Greater Glasgow, Scotland:*
*
1. The patient has no previous history of suicides.*
*
2. Patient has left her white blood cells at another hospital.*
*
3. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a
40 pound weight gain in the past three days.*
*
4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very
hot in bed last night.*
*
5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.*
*
6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it
disappeared.*
*
7.. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be
depressed.*
*
8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.*
*
9. Discharge status:- Alive, but without my permission.*
*
10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert, but
forgetful.*
*
11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.*
*
12. She is numb from her toes down.*
*
13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.*
*
14. The skin was moist and dry.*
*
15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.*
*
16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.*
*
17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.*
*
18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she
got a divorce.*
*
19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our care for physical
therapy.*
*
20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.*
*
21 Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.*
*
22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.*
*
23. Skin: somewhat pale, but present.*
*
24. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.*
*
25. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.*
*
26. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities*
*
.
27. When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.*
*
28. The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran
out of fuel and crashed.*
*
29. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.*
*
30. She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate
directions in early December.*
*
31. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Smith, who felt we should sit on
the abdomen and I agree.*
*
32. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a
stock broker instead.*
*
33. By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was
feeling bette
"~ Love conquers all, but if love doesn't do it, try hard work ~."
http://www.google.com/profiles/samson13.
Face it... Fight it
SAMSON :-)
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