Wednesday, November 25, 2009

{SamsoNgroup} If only Resumes told the truth!

 If only Resumes told the truth!

OBJECTIVE: To sit in a cubicle and stare at a monitor for eight hours, occasionally looking attentive when approached by a superior.

School: Very Expensive
Major: Not Important
GPA: Don't Ask

EMPLOYMENT and past Experience

* NETWORK MANAGEMENT (Present): Produced daily itinerary of television programs to watch. Duties included changing channels, avoiding infomercials, and staying tuned after those messages.

* DEBT CONSOLIDATION (7/06-10/07): Using various tools such as credit cards and borrowed cash, I managed to combine groups of unpaid bills into one monthly bill that goes straight to my father.

* RESIDENT INHALER (9/04-6/06): Assisted all students with chemical intake from purchasing to exhaling.

* Solitaire
* Minesweeper
* On/Off Repair Method

* First Place in Hot Dog eating and beer drinking tournaments.
* Said Toast at brother's wedding.
* Highest Score on Pin Ball Machine.

For further references, contact my mother. For positive responses, please pose all questions as though you're considering me as a law school applicant.

"Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice."

Face it... Fight it



You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Samsongroup" group.
To post to this group, send email to
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to
For more options, visit this group at